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Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Dentist

Well this week is just about as bad as last thanks for asking...
oh wait...
*looks at 0 comments*
I guess no one asked.
*glares at family that are morally obligated to read and post on family members blogs*

Well, I'll talk as if you cared.

I mentioned last time that I was going to the dentist for the first time in years.
Almost 16 years actually.
When you tell a dental hygienist that you haven't been in 16 years their face goes through a few emotions... like horror, pity, fear of what they will find...

When you say that to a dentist they just glare at you, like you stepped on a kitten.

So lets step back... I got off work and went to get My Love like I always do...but first, I was ravenous so I also got a chicken sandwich with onions! No, not cuz I wanted to make the dentist cry, it's my comfort food and I was hungry! Geeze!
So I inhale my food while I wait for My Love to get off work. I didn't relinquish the drivers seat when he came out. I can't recall what we were talking about as I drove off I just know my anxiety level was rising. So I was probably jabbering.
I made the turn to head to the dentist.
"Were are we going?" My Love asks.
"Remember I have a dentist appointment." my reply, hands had gone white knuckled on the steering wheel. I knew what he was going to say.
"Sooo...why aren't you taking me home first?"

The next few exchanges I shall spare you.
Needless to say I was furious, much better then scared/nervous.
I drove him home and said not a word.
Yes, me not talking.
He doesn't like waiting rooms, doctors offices, or hospitals. I believe my last words to him were something along the lines of "Whaaa."
I was able to run in and brush my teeth so I wouldn't be offensive to the poor individuals who had to work on me, so it wasn't a total loss.

Unfortunately, or maybe not, they were ready for me as soon as I walked in. I was ushered back into the little alcove with the funny chair that i was suddenly scared to sit in... she should me where I could hang my purse, I was nervous enough I forgot to get out my bell balls... I think they are called mediation balls or something... mine are named Harmony (shes blue) and Balance (he's green). Yes, I named them.
What?
So she made me sit in the scary chair...staring longingly at my purse, but too unnerved to ask to get them. I am not one of those people who can hide their emotions, they are usually written with psychedelic flames across my face. She started handle me like a kid.

My mouth is small. I think it's a family thing. Also my wisdom teeth never came all the way in on the bottom and didn't even try to on the top...umm do we have wisdom teeth on top?
She took the xrays and did it as fast as she could, she ran back and forth between the button and my mouth. i don't know why she did that...maybe i looked like I was going to bolt?
She had trouble with the first few, we had to use a smaller more flexible size.But they still cut the roof of my mouth.

Then she disappeared... to get get help. I had almost gathered my nerves back and was moving to get up...to get my balls, I think she thought I was making a run for it. Cuz before I could explain I just wanted my bell balls she had the chair leaned uncomfortably far back and raised up. Apparently just to make it harder to escape. Cuz the next thing she did was stick a metal thing in my mouth! She was poking me with the metal thing and calling out numbers to the helper..3..4...3...2...4...2...3...3....5...
Was she counting cavities! Oh my gosh! Was that how many cavities I have in each tooth!?!
Panic!
Fear!
Must calm, must calm...where are my bells!
Can't get them...
...4...3...3...4...
Ceiling blank, I bet they get tired of hearing they should have something on the ceiling.
I bet they painted the walls this color to be CALMING.
they should get their money back.
Holy cow! Look at my shoes!
I seriously need new ones. What is that?
Did I step on a ketchup packet?
great, can I hide my feet? Can the assistant see that?
Seriously, they are hammered.
But I really like them, they are tan suede high tops.
Nike airs, My Love insisted I get Nike airs if I have to work and be on my feet all day.
But i haven't found any like them.
Okay...enough with the terrifying numbers already!
A six! Are you kidding! I have 6 cavities in that tooth!
I like the orange on my shoes too.
Yey. I like their orange soles.
Maybe if I put in the orange shoe laces they wont be so bad...

OH THANK GOODNESS, they are done.

So That was my state of mind. I REALLY could have used a hand to hold or the bell balls at least.
I shall spare you the rest.


i good news: i only had 1 cavity! My first one in my whole like thank you.
the bad news: I need to get a scaling done.
I shall not go into what that is because it makes skin crawl.

My teeth are terribly discolored because of 16 years of missed cleanings...


The End, cuz I don't want to talk about it any more.

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