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Monday, December 20, 2010


here it is 6:30 am on Monday December 20th...leaving 4 days till Christmas.
I think I may need to panic here soon, or something.
You see I have yet to do any Christmas shopping, haven't yet determined the budget,
I have to head to work in a bit and will later today have a meeting with the loss
Prevention guy from corporate...
Oh and Monster is puking everywhere! Thunderous has a headache and a stomachache...
not puking yet
Eldest is being extremely responsible (or just trying to avoid the vomiting) and is
insisting she must go to school as she has finals.

I have a headache.

and tummy kinda hurts too.

wonder how fast the week will go...

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Little things

One way I have tried to keep me out of jail or an asylum is to be amused by the little things.
Laugh instead of scream.

It may sound cruel but today I abut died laughing when Thunderous yelled to Monster "I do not have an issue!"
Of course it was in reply to her comment, "You have issues." After he explained to her how he was using a ruler and some math the figure out how to draw Denmark's flag so it wasn't off center, but was still accurate...

Thunderous is literal, obsessive, and abhors chaos... and chaos is anything that is not even, precise, orderly: classic for his 'Issues'

This is Denmark's flag for those who don't know:

Do you see his dilemma? To be accurate and precise he must show it EXACTLY as it should be...but... "Do you know how hard it is for me to draw off center?!" he exclaims after explaining it again to his dad & I.

I am so impressed that he is trying...not screaming tearing the paper up and destroying a room...just using what he knows works for him (art & math) and trying.

It may still come to tears, but till then at least we laughed.

Friday, December 3, 2010

a haiku to wake up too

I can't decide yet...
Doctor Pepper in morning,
or coco better?

it seems either way
I am dependent on them
to start the day well.

Maybe I should change...
get more sleep and vitamins,
not fake stimulants.

hummm...asleep on time?
that's not going to happen.
Doctor Pepper then!

cold dose of caffeine!
(and maybe a bran muffin)
I can pretend health :)

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving!

I would love to share my thanksgiving...but instead for now I shall leave this:

Dear shoppers,
You have to Shop on THANKSGIVING?
Retail wage slave who has to give up Infinitely Invaluable family time so you can argue with me over whether Black Fridays sales are valid today.

Monday, November 22, 2010

not the only poet

Like my haiku from yesterday? I am not the only poetically inclined one in the family.
Eldest likes to post her Dark Emo Poetry as her status on that social networking site. I asked her to put them in a poetry book instead...think I'll get her one for Christmas. I try really hard not to roll my eyes when I read some of her work. It is terribly mean of me, but I do tell her sometimes that her work is 'a cliche wrapped in a stereo type'. Don't take me wrong, she is talented enough it's just the whole "Look at me... I'm dark and spooky!" gets old. I would love to see her write some real heart felt poetry, not just stuff to impress her audience.

and so she doesn't feel singled out...

My Love also writes me.
He wrote this to me a few days ago:

Not Quite Epic~
by ...some guy with a pony tail...

Not Butcher, King, or even Knaak, my feeble pen they could surly sack!
I may not be like all the rest,
knowing this, I will never be the best.
I may not write with a Golden Pen, or thrill my fans again and again. I don't write for fortune or fame, but what I write has meaning all the same.
My words don't come to life and spring from the page,
they are more like trained animals locked in a cage.

The words I write are part of me, they will be now, and for ever will be. So run your fingers through my hair. Caress my face full, with your special care. Feel my passion Hard and Sweet,
Hold my Love and never weep!
For what I carry for you is real, and for you,
it is fueled for ever still and will never sleep,
slumber it will not for as long as my heart beats.
When the day has come and my heart beats no more, my spirit carries my Love for you as it shines for ever more.

What you see is not always what you get, and One size never fits all, but when our spirits entwined together a spark engulfed into a flame of passion and its burning out of control!

"I am not a poet, I am just a man,,, but sometimes am man can do anything". ...some guy with a ponytail...

I may not be famous but my love for you is equal to any that has been written about or written about in song. Mostly because it is Ours!
I Love you,

We both are kinda hopeless romantics.
We used to write love notes to each other like crazy!
I have 2 moving boxes filled with love notes we have left each other over the years. I was just going through the voice mails on my phone and realized all my saved messages are little love notes from him too.
When we moved and I got to look through the box before setting it in the To Keep pile I laughed at all the different things they were written on..everything from napkins and bubble gum wrappers to stationary and handmade paper.
I was noticing a decline in our love notes and was kinda sad...then I realized we aren't sending them less... we just aren't WRITING them! That beautiful poem he sent me was in a online game we play...all the voice mails on my phone...just not on paper.

Hummmm... maybe I should break that trend.
I think I will go write him a little love haiku before I head to work.
I leave it on his keyboard so he will be sure to see it!

how do you leave love note?

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Fybro Haiku

wrote this small haiku to fibromyalgia today:

Pain, pain go away
Come again no other day
if you don't.... I cry.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Cooking & Feasts...and rambling

Today is our birthday dinner for Monster.
In our house you get to pick your Birthday Diner and Monster knows exactly what she wants.
mashed potatoes
home made rolls
and Pumpkin Pie, not birthday cake, yet. (She has decided she wants a Boston creme pie for her birthday cake on her birthday)
Huuummmm... I am noticing a lack of veggies. Odd for Monster, there should be peas or broccoli on that menu, but I digress..

Oh and as her gift? She wants Eldest to cook it!

Eldest has experience with cooking such feasts so I have no real fear about it... and Monster had an excellent thought process on her decision. If Eldest makes her Birthday turkey and I make the Thanksgiving turkey they will be different enough that no one will notice that we had a feast twice in one month!

What her birthday request has really made me think of is family recipes.
You see, years ago when I first started 'teaching' my kids to cook I told them to pick their favorite foods to learn to cook. I mean really what's the point of learning to scramble an egg if you hate eating them? So they learned things like crepes, cookies, and meatloaf before hot dogs and tater tots.
But now we are running into an odd problem.
They want to cook it the way I make it.
But I don't follow recipes. I just feel my way thru the food!
Like the bread dough I am mixing for her rolls today... I measured the water and yeast, but everything else I kinda jut threw in there. I mean it's probably about 4 cups of flour, but I didn't measure it and I know it will be a little on the sweet side, but couldn't tell you how much sugar I added either. This batch wont have yogurt added but the last rolls did.

There has been more then one night of the kids deciding they want to make diner... but we end up calling each other 5 times so I can walk them thru a dish because I have never written it down!

I guess it is good in one way... they are quite creative in the kitchen.
Eldest has decided to use some cranberry pomegranate juice on the turkey and she is going to use the giblets in the gravy in different way.
Another random observation...when eldest is cooking her bi-polar seems to be more stable. I don't know if maybe she only cooks when she is on a certain pole or cooking keeps her from swinging so hard.
I know Thunderous loves cooking because in his words: "It is an art and a science! It is precise and free! It has rules and you can follow them and play!" (Autism can make you a dali lama)
But I have noticed she is different when she cooks...maybe we need to encourage culinary school instead of mechanics.

I need to check the dough and see what Eldest has created while I wrote this...
should be a grand feast!

Monday, November 1, 2010

Hit by a... Muse?

I'm sick, I have lost my voice, and I am getting irritated.
I do not make a good patient, as the nurses from last year can attest to.
No, I haven't barricaded myself in a corner...yet...but that option is still open as far as I am concerned.
Now, before this vile immune system attack I was attacked by something I rather enjoy.
I was hit by a Muse(...must have been hit hard cuz it's taking so long to recover.)

I decided to participate in my first BlogSwap, a color themed one to be precise. We were to make one of the items we would be sending.
I was a little intimidated, I mean what if they don't like it?

I played with some beads and stones and come up with a few designs...

What that means is I made and destroyed at least 3 designs before I finally was half satisfied.
This is what I came up with...


That broke something lose and I made another necklace right away.

Then took it apart.

and made this one:


You may notice it is one of my least favorite colors.
What on earth could have possessed me to put something pink together you may ask...
Well, Breast Cancer.
We were having a Breast Cancer awareness Month at work. We donated all our tips from the cafe and had special cupcakes, balloons, other fun stuff all in pink.
We were having a couple of ladies from the Susan G Koman foundation come in on the last day and present them with our donations and have them do a presentation.
Well that pink masterpiece was supposed to be auctioned off on the finial night...
everyone was very excited.
Then I got sick, went home early, and missed the event.
Some how my necklace was forgotten and stayed displayed till this morning when I came in.
So they gave it back to me.

To tell you the truth, that was rather a let down.
I didn't cry though (at least not right away or at work)

Anyone want to buy a nice choker?
It's got good Karma.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

What did EVIL stand for again?

Want to have fun?

Bust your kid(s) doing something wrong while you are gone....
then tell them you know they did it because you have a hidden digital camera that showed it...
then sit back and try not to giggle as they try to find it.

It's fun listening to their whispered councils with each other about the places it could be.



Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Mirror, Mirror on the wall...never mind.

So there is nothing quite as eye opening to how goofy you really are like reading a non- relative/non-friend's blog.
After reading the first post you find through (or maybe you don't even make it that far) you get to say to yourself, "Huh, so that's what a blog is supposed to look like. What the heck have I been doing?"
I am now eyeing my copy of Blogging for Dummies, a gift from my eldest. Perhaps that was a subtle hint that I missed the first time round. Darn kids.
To tell you the truth I don't even read my own blog.... maybe that would help LOL!


Sunday, October 10, 2010

Monster Althlete

One day last month Monster came up to me after I had gotten home from work and handed me a packet of papers, Thunderous was trying to talk to me at the same time as she, gee that's a shock, so I had to make her tell me what she had just said again.
She stood there and told me: didn't ask me, no hesitation...just very confidently told me she had joined a triathlon team at school for special School Cup Triathlon. She would be the swimmer on the Wild Cats team. There was a meeting on a Thursday at 5:30pm and the event was October 2nd 6am. She already had her teammates and a scholarship to pay the entry fee. She was so herself again I could only smile and agree. Now, if I would just fill out the permission form she could go train.
I filled out the forms while she changed into her swimsuit and then recruited her brother to be her personal trainer; Because, as you know, all the best athletes have personal trainers and coaches.

She took it very seriously. She trained in the pond everyday after school for 2 weeks. My Love and I started to talk. She was putting forth such an effort we needed to help, support her efforts. We worried that she had only every swum in our pond out back. Not a bad place to spend the time mind you, but she was expected to swim 4 laps of the community pool for her part of the triathlon... she had been running every recces with her teammate that would do the 1.2 mile run and jump roping with the teammate who would be doing the 3.5 mile bike race part. I'm not exactly sure how the jumping rope helps you ride a bike, but I did not argue. As we got daily reports on the girls, we had to be sure she would preform well for her team!
A few phone calls later and we had it: A pool.
One of the local hotels was more then happy to let her come and train in their pool. That way she would be used to a indoor pool with all it's clear water and humility!
She had a sponsor.

So now, after diner we would load up and go swim laps together, even the other 2 finished chores in time to come a few time.
She was good.
She worked hard and experimented with a couple different styles of swimming before she found the ones that worked best for her. That first practice was interesting for me, because on a pure impulse I had dyed my hair the day before.
Just walkin' down the isle at the store and said "Oh, hey...I think I'll do that..." grabbed a few boxes and voila! My hair was red before the hour was out. Yeah...timing could have been better on that I guess... So as all you who have had your hair dyed or permed can imagine...pool water, new dye... I tried not to get my hair wet.
Ever trained a swimmer without getting your hair wet?
Was interesting.

So it became a routine. Pick mom up from work, eat dinner , workout at pool, home, shower, bed...with a few variations that included taking the other 2 somewhere dropping them off then workout at pool, pick them up, home, shower, bed or that really great night of go to Homecoming, train, home, shower, bed.

Then 3 days before the BIG DAY one of her teammates, the biker, pulls out. Tell you the truth I didn't even ask why, I was too busy trying to work out with the event planners a way to fix it.
They found a girl, a runner, in a grade higher whose teammates hadn't made the deadline on the forms so was about to pull out. There was some race rearranging and they had a new teammate!
Oh! I may have made a friend out of it too! One of the teammates mother and I knew each other casually... she is one of my regular customers from work! After the girls introduced us we then found out the boys were in scouts together! Small town :)

The 2 nights before the race we went to the BIG MEETING. She got a bag, her number, and placement. She got her team number written on her with permanent marker: 191!
Then there was a review of the rules, procedure, the course route, more rules, and then Q&A.
She was thrilled that her bag had a water-bottle, a t shirt, gift certificates from places in town, a power bar, and oddly enough a toothbrush and toothpaste...still not bad breath on race day?
BUT we never found any of her teammates, they never checked in.

Day before race: minor trauma when the sunscreen she put on for her field trip washed the numbers right off of her leg and arm! The Lady at the BIG MEETING had said it would be there for a week!

to be cont.

Life Happends

The last month has been so busy I don't know where I am sometimes!
To sum it up I will tell you about a Saturday I had a few weeks ago...
I worked my usually 9 hour shift, then came home.... oh wait had to stop at the store to buy something for dinner, then get home. In the car we talked about what Eldest would wear to homecoming that night. I had made the shirt I was wearing to work that day and Eldest suggested I could sew her something to wear. I mean, come on, the dance is a long 3 hours away. After I stopped laughing I decided okay, we'll see what we can do.

I had made my shirt using 2 t-shirts, so while My Love tossed diner in the oven, I changed, and the girls went to the shed and hauled in a bag of discarded t-shirts. We agreed before I started on a t-shirt dress for her that she would try on my old Homecoming dress.
She could have pulled it off, but I had curves where she doesn't really yet.
Suddenly there is no time left... I dig out an old black sheath dress and gloves and a wrap and so on... We did her hair and makeup and accessorised and made her Cinderella in time. Also had diner and walked the dogs in that time.

Okay... I am now not sure how I managed all this I know I did...but now the details are a little muddled....

We loaded up in the van and headed out...
Pick Thunderous One up from a 25 mile bike ride and camping trip,
Picked up 3 of Eldest's friends...
Dropped all the teens off at the dance,
Went to a hotel in town and trained Monster for her triathlon,
Pick Eldest up from the dance and got everyone back home and in bed before 10.

No, did I do that?

Friday, September 17, 2010

too tired to rant

but just want to say this:

Autism doesn't make them broken or aliens or ill needing to be cured...

They are just like every other human on the planet: they need to learn to live in their skin.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010


For no particular reason that I can put my finger on I am missing my Grandmas today.

Maybe it's the fall like weather we are having. It makes me want to snuggle under an afghan. One grandma used to make them. I loved watching her make her squares and all the really cool colors and textures and patterns she could make. She didn't even have to look at it! No really, she didn't. She was blind. She taught me how to crochet and knit when I was very young... but I never managed to figure out how to control the tension on my yarn, still haven't. I don't have any of her afghans.
She used to make us chocolate chip cookies! She was famous to us kids for those cookies. But I will tell you a secret now...I liked my brothers cookies the best. Once he learned how to bake his were better. I always felt slightly bad about that...traitorous even.

My other grandma made the best potato candy! I love her potato candy! There isn't anything as sweet as it in the world! I keep thinking I will try and improve on her version...I never do. I loved Thanksgiving at her house! Although I never did try her mince meat pie. I think I cheated myself out of something good. I never did get up the nerve to try it. I mean come on! It was pie with the word meat in it!

I would be so content if I could curl up under Grandma's afgan and eat a piece of Grandma's potato candy.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Request for Advice

I have 2 topics I want to bounce of of someone...
so... tag, you're it!
First one:
Eldest is starting high school and would like a cell phone. We have come up with the following contract. I would like impute on it... any advice from parents of cell carrying kids especially! Anything we should add?
I, (place your name here), do agree to earn and maintain grades in each of my high school classes of an A or B (a B- will count as a B for one semester only).
After earning these grades I shall receive a basic pay-as-you-go cell phone with $15 worth of minutes.
I will earn upgrades to the phone and or additional minutes by maintaining A's & B's or improving my grades.
I may lose phone privileges if my grades fall, chores are not done, any rues not adhered to, and at the discretion of my parents.
I understand having a cell phone is a privilege and I wish to earn that privilege.

Everyone's signature.

What do you think?
Really need some comment on this one... I just might beg!

Now the second thing: I would like to hear about is crock-pot cooking.
We use ours OFTEN!
But we keep running into the same problem.
We follow recipes and experiment but very rarely do we seem to get the food out of the crock-pot as flavorful as we want. We usually have to season again on our plates.
More garlic, pepper and salt almost every time.
Is there a secret we are missing?
Do you have to seriously over season for it to have flavor?
Or are we adding ti at the wrong time?
Perhaps it should be added in the last 30 minutes rather then at the beginning?
Anyone have experience with this?


Friday, August 20, 2010

Bounty Hunter

My Love just got home.. he had exciting news...
He saw Dog the bounty hunter downtown as he rode home from work.
All black, long blond hair, 'sleeves', 2 black...ummm...can't remember the name of the SUVs but he knew...
and they were video taping.
He looped around the block but they all got into thier SUVs before he got back. I guess they knew he had made them.

I wish I could get up the energy to be excited about it...maybe go hunt them down myself...i will be a bounty hunter myself someday after all.... but just too empty to try right now.
I'm letting the 2 oldest take their bikes down the street though.
maybe I'll just call everyone I know and really blow their cover
*evil grin*

Dog has a link on his page about it :)
No crazy!
It really was Dog
Dog the Bounty Hunter

Friday, June 18, 2010

Happy Birthday Eldest!

It's someones birthday!
I found a great comic for her Bday


Tuesday, May 18, 2010


I wanted to share my pain with people, to maybe help them understand a fraction of what it is like to live with fibromyalgia. One of the problems with that is how daily the pain and problems are different and also how each of us experience it differently. I have a few good online fybro friends and their experience and what helps are often quite different. They did encourage me to share this description though…none of them experience it quite this way but they think it helps illustrate to the non suffers out there a bit of what we are living with.

I would like to introduce you all to my vial nemesis, Snake.

Snake this everybody.

Snake is my most common way to experience my fybro. Snake used to just live in my left leg. When I first met…him? (I think it is asexual so what do I call it?)... He was wrapped around and through my calf, squeezing and slithering. His Long curved poison dripping fangs were buried in my ankle. His tail occasionally hitting my knee. Still seems to be one of his favorite places.

Snake can change sizes…tiny as a gardener as big as the Basilisk. But always Acid Green with black and red eyes, long curling fangs the drip and pump poison. Sometime he lies quietly and I can pretend he is asleep or even not there…other times he grows and has kids, each torturing a different part of me. Yesterday, two of his kids were attacking my hands…one wrapping from the right elbow down to the wrist, up the pinking, just being a pain…the other was through my left wrist and sinking its sharp fangs into my palm hard. Made it rather difficult to work. Amazing what you need your hands for in a day isn’t it? Every move I made would irritate the baby snakes and they would bite or squeeze harder, squirm so you never forget they are there. Sucking the strength from the hands till you can hardly hold the handle on a door to open it. Today the one on the right has its tail buried through my shoulder and is constricting down the whole length with its teeth in a death grip on my pinkie.

See, sometimes they constrict, sometimes they bite, sometimes they slither… It is really hard to describe. It’s like they are in the muscle, on the muscle, they are the muscle. Sometimes it’s the bones.

Every day is different, some days bad, some good, some horrid. Some days I walk with a cane, some days I hike 7 miles. Some days can't pick up a gallon of milk, others heave 40 pound boxes into a dumpster.

So I have 2 sayings I try to keep in my mind:

Give me enough time and I can do Anything!


Pain is to be endured. It ends or it does not.

That last one was from a book I love! It may not sound too hopeful, but it really works for me. I can't say This too shall pass...because that would be a lie. It's chronic, it will not pass. But I will endure, cuz it will end or it won't.

So anyway, that is Snake.

I hope you never meet in person.

Thursday, April 8, 2010


It's bad enough being ill on someone else birthday (so sorry Tom)
But on your own?!
That should be against the Laws of the Universe!

funny quote for the day:
Eldest, after enjoying the afternoon with me listening to 60's music,
"Was everybody in the 60's Emo?"

Saturday, April 3, 2010

Sometimes OCD is okay...maybe

A few weeks ago Thunderous went ice fishing with his scout troop. He caught 5 fish that day and ate them all! He talked about nothing but fish, fishing, fishing poles, technique, lures...if it could possibly relate to fish he would make it.
Like many Obsessive episodes it got to the point that we all wanted to scream....and what did we do?
We bought him a fishing pole for his birthday.

My Beautiful Sister has a Cabela's near her house and was wonderful enough to go there and find him a pole...not just any pole... the PERFECT POLE. That's what he says.
His reaction isn't what people would want to see when excited about something. No yelling and jumping up and down. Nothing as obvious as that. No he is subtle. If you get a grin then you know it is good.

My Beautiful Sister also made his birthday cake!
Check this out:
Did she do the most superb job or what?
He loved the cake! How do I know he loved it if he didn't jump up and down and exclaim or faint or what not?
He carried the cake around for 2 days.

That's not really as odd as it sounds at first...okay maybe it is.

We were at Arches national park(you can see some in the background) so he wanted to find just the right place to eat it. We never found a table, he had to have a table to eat it on. The 2 places for tables appear to be the Devils Garden area at the end of the road or the Visitors Center at the beginning. We were on our way home so finally he decided we would just eat it when we got home. He set it on the seat next to him and hovered over it protectively all the way home (4 hours, we took the scenic way). When we got home he decided it was too late. He wanted to enjoy the cake and now he was too tired to! I could not believe it!
We finally got to have a piece after breakfast. He declared it the best cake he had ever eaten! There was a moment when he was worried because Monster said she thought the water was made out of tooth paste. Then My Love said "Mmmm...minty!" I almost smacked them! but he made it better and told Thunderous he was just playing. It all ended well...the cake didn't last past lunch!

As you may know Thunderous' main Obsession is All Things Water. Pirates, Sailors, and wooden boats have been the main focus most of his life... so why didn't I see fishing coming? Maybe Grandpa influenced him with the tale of Whalers in the family history.

Needles to say after the ice-fishing he was...wait for it...Hooked! You may laugh now...or groan which ever works for ya.

When we met up with my beautiful Sister on Thursday to save her from Eldest she gave Thunderous his new fishing pole.
Again, he hovered over it protectively.
Again she scored big time!

So off is set another round of OCD about Fishing.
He carried the pole around. Told anyone who would listen, and the cockatiel or dogs when no one else would listen, about his pole about the lures about everything he knew about fishing. He looked at every piece that came in the small tackle box with the pole. He learned to tie a blood knot and the fishermen knot and practiced them over and over. When he got a 10 dollar bill from Grandma & Grandpa for his birthday we couldn't get him to Wal-mart fast enough. You should have seen his eyes when he stood in the isle with the rows and rows of lures! In true guy form he bought a bigger tackle box and some new lures.

And he has been fishing since.

If I can't find him he is outside practicing his cast into the drained pond. He asked My Love to walk the creek behind the house with him and show him the best places for fish and why.
This afternoon he looked up the almanac and wrote down all the good and best days for fishing.
He then spent the rest of the day outside, the fishing was Good for the Evening. I had to call him in for dinner, he spent the whole time telling us his adventures and ideas. As soon as he could he was out the door again, because after dinner it is Evening, you know.

Too soon he was back in..we thought his line had tangled again. Nope! He walked into the living room with this:

It was still swing on the line and flipping about...IN MY LIVING ROOM!
When he went to put it in the sink it landed in the dish water! It was not happy. "At least it's clean." He says.
We measured it. 11 1/2 inches. I don't have a scale to weigh it though.
We think it's a rainbow trout.
He was out the door to do more fishing in no time. He came in briefly to check what the almanac says for tomorrows fishing.
He came back in for the night too soon for him, his line tangled. He plans to find out more about fishing line soon...I sent him to the shower first.

Now I get the adventure of cleaning it?
Yeah, I don't think so.
Where is My Love?

Friday, April 2, 2010


Just a few Random things...

Monster: "Look Mom! A hippy van with an actual hippy in it!" said loudly enough the whole parking lot heard,of course.

Thunderous, on a trip to Moab exclaiming on the incredible sights said to monster,"That rock is as thin as your skull!"

Eldest: Here Mom, listen to this song....wait! You're not supposed to like it!"

Sister:"I fell better now after making fun of your irrational fears. Thanks!"

I have come to the realization that I don't like to drive on the highway.
Why you ask? It's simple.

I hurry.

See on the highway you are going 75 miles an hour.

That is fast.

I feel like I am going fast.............well if I am going fast then I must be in a hurry................if I am in a hurry then it MUST be an EMERGENCY!......

so, yeah, I don't like to drive on the highway.

and then there's Thunderous sitting in the passenger seat....
"Mom, do you know the speed limit?"
"I think you are going to fast, mom."
"Mom, it's 75."
"Did you see the sign mom?"
"Mom, it's"
"MOM the speed limit is 75...MOM YOU ARE GOING 80!! Mom it's 75!"
I made him sit in the back the next time.

Sunday, March 7, 2010


I can't tell you how happy we are!
Monster has had 2 "stroke-like incidence" in the last 2 years.
It changed her.

Since we have moved in we have seen a steady change back to how she was.
Less breaking down into tears and more climbing trees. We have a pine next to the cabin that is as tall as the house. She now climbs it regularly.

and this morning?

She is in the yard with a mirror and a camera.
Why? you ask...
She is hunting Scunts.

Saturday, January 30, 2010


I am sure moving is stressful and eventful for ANYONE that has to go thru it.
I am discovering this week just how much is added when you toss in the whole Mental/emotional challenged to the mix.

Thunderous hasn't slept since we showed him the place we are moving to. (hence I do not get to sleep.)

Eldest is flipping between talking non-stop obsessive to reclusive and silent so fast and so many times it makes my head hurt.

Thunderous has his room already packed.

Eldest .... well I have no idea what she is doing. It looks mostly packed...but she keeps arranging and re-arranging things.

Monster (shares the room) is mostly hiding. She doesn't want to be around Eldest.

Basically I am very tired.
and if I think too much I start having a panic attack.

My Love and I keep inventing things for Thunderous to do to try and keep him from obsessing or locking down. He had his first big fight with his best friend this week so that has made him...more reactive...raw... I can' think of a word to describe it.
He is currently trying to make a scale model of his new room and all the pieces of his furniture so he can arrange/plan and fung shui his room. Kinda hard to do with out the measurements but boy is he trying!
We are really happy with how well he has been handling this...but honestly, I'm not sure how we (Thunderous and myself) will survive this week! Or perhaps I should say I'm not sure WHO will survive this week.
We are going to ask if we can began the move early...that should give Thunderous time to adjust.

I don't know what will help Eldest.
Most of the time I don't think I know enough about her bipolar to really help her.
One thing I did learn is she thinks Pink Floyd is "weird" "creeps her out".
Oh and she thinks it's too on the dark side. LOL! This from the kid who tried to be Emo!
(she is talking about making a quilt that has pieces that symbolize all the different part of all the stereo types that she feels she is. I told her to go for it!)
She is mostly in her room this morning. She keeps coming out to just stand in a room. She doesn't say anything: just stands there. Then she will go back to her room. The next time she comes out she might be talking non-stop about something or she might just stand in a room again.
Seems to be processing something.

*sigh* the list of To Do is getting longer and longer.
I'm going to buy a huge stack of paper plates so we wont have to worry about dishes (cuz I'm packing them all up!)
gonna listen to my favorite song and get moving.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Don't know what to title this post yet... I'll get back to that.

Today is "One of those days" I guess.
You see this morning I have to go to court for the neighbors dog killing my duck.
Thunderous One cracked a tooth, so I will be taking him to the dentist.
He and the Monster have an eye exam this afternoon. (His first ever)
Last night we went to look at 3 places, which sent each special need into it's own unique over load.
I'm supposed to work. (not gonna happen)
I have to call on more places and go by a local place to see if we can get a land/home package...

It seems quite alot.

I have to admit, I wasn't quite ready for the break downs... I should have been, I've had enough experience right?
Eldest went off because she wants her own room and wants to live in town. So we are all evil and against her because we didn't like the one place that she did.
Thunderous couldn't stop analyzing each place over and over out loud for the next several hours and quizzing everyone on their thoughts. It was obsessive! Drove me crazy! I can only say the same thing for 3 hours before I get annoyed. He couldn't sleep last night because of it and his tooth was driving him crazy... He talked in his sleep all night. Which kept waking me up.
Of course Eldest's walking around in the middle of the night didn't help.
This move is going to set every disorder off isn't it?
Monster was just upset because her sibs were and they kept telling her "what to do."
It's even brought out all of My Love's disorders too~!

okay timer went off...means I have to go (that's how I am keeping myself going now, use a timer!)

So lets play a quick game of name this post as I can't think of what to call it...
any suggestions?

Friday, January 15, 2010

When NOT to watch movies ____________or Not KNOWing

So, I was going to write a big insightful post about having the strength to let your kids go...
or rather NOT having the strength to let your kids go even if it means the extinction of the entire human race cuz you are selfish and would keep them with you...

Of course, I then realized that would be one long crazy rambling post...okay an even longer crazier rambling post then usual.

So, what I am going to say instead is: Perhaps it is best to NOT watch deep movies about the end of the world when you are melancholy and stressed out over your own real children and life.

Just a thought.

Just putting that idea out there.

Might take my own advice someday.

Not gonna watch Knowing again (if I can help it)
Perhaps an encore of Julie & Julia instead...?
Yes, that should do quite nicely.
Who wouldn't prefer thinking about boning a duck rather then Alien/angels and solar flares of doom?

So, in case we missed the moral of the story.
Use Care In Thy Movie Viewing.

the end.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Ice Cream!!!!

Who cares if it is winter and currently about 30 degrees!
At work we talked about our town's Dairy Queen and wondered why it closes for the winter every year.
Now this darling blog I follow is having a contest to win an ice cream maker!
You can enter too, just follow this link Embrace the Chill

We all like ice cream in this house!
In fact tonight we had to go to the store. Monster was in charge of the list. She looked it over and covertly added Ice cream to the bottom. (well... she added pizza too, but we are talking about Ice Cream!)

We each like our ice cream a different way:

My Love likes it simple.
Vanilla with caramel topping. Photobucket

Eldest likes vanilla with chocolate chips or M&M's.

Thunderous One likes as much as he can get! "Soft, not too cold. Covered in chocolate sauce and M&M's." He likes to have One scoop of Vanilla and One Scoop of chocolate. He amuses me because he wont eat any ice cream that comes with 'stuff' already in it.

Monster like hers as "chocolate ice cream, with M&M's on top, chocolate crumbed chocolate....and any other chocolate stuff"

and me?

I like to match my ice cream to my mood, usually leaning toward chocolate though.
I like the complex ones like Moose tracks or Rocky Road or some specialty one as a special treat when I am feeling good. I'll toss most anything on it, also matching my mood.
Fudge or Chocolate sauce if I'm going to watch a movie, especially a scary one.
Candy bars for Family movies. Maple syrup when I feel like annoying My Love... Photobucket
When I am feeling down... I usually throw on nuts and you know I am feeling very down, melancholy, or nostalgic if I add corn chips.

Corn chips are the most special topping.

My Dad introduced me to the specialness of Corn chips on ice cream. I can't have a bowl with out seeing him and the kitchen from childhood.. that and caramel corn, but that would be another blog.

Tonight though I think a plain chocolate will be nice.
Something smooth and calm...calm would be very nice tonight.


a smartalicy teen, who has no regard for her personal safety, STOLE MY HOT CHOCOLATE!

and it was just any hot chocolate!
It was The goddesses ebil dark hot chocolate! (melt a special dark chocolate candy bar in half and half)

She has postponed her languishing demise by flee to the safety of the school bus

But I shall find her
oh yes I will
and when I do she shall rue the day! Yes the WHOLE day! She shall rue it all!



Monday, January 4, 2010


Eldest has been doing really good! She had her usual bad pole this fall but has leveled out alot in the past week. So much so that she was able to spend 2 nights at her best friends and she didn't have the backlash that we have come to expect afterwords!
She is happier about how she looks too when she is balanced like this.

Tonight she asked me to help her with her nails. Eldest bites her nails really badly and when she is in her more stable times she really hates it and tires to stop, but it's a nervous habit in her less balanced times. So the damage is bad. I worry he nails will end up looking like my dad's.

Knowing this Monster bought her a set of fake nails for Christmas. Monster carefully chose a set that wasn't too Girly or too Emo. They are a french manicure with black tips instead of white and a pink scull and cross bone off to on side.

Eldest hopes they will keep her from biting her nails and her hands will look good while they heal!
Smart girl.

Here are her nails, what do you think?

close nails

We didn't have lots of conversation while she carefully matched each nail to a finger. But it was just a nice calm mom and daughter moment. She matched the nails and I squeezed the stubborn glue bottle and pressed each one on till the glue dried. We sat off in a courner of the room by ourselves and really didn't pay attention to everyone else.

Shes been kinda quiet the last few days.We had a girls night Saturday and she picked 3 girly movies we would never have watched if the boys were home! We just sat next to eachother quietly on the couch and watched the movies, except during Twilight which we both tore apart for not following the book when we wanted it to.

Quiet is not like her, so though it seems we are in the more balanced time, I will still keep watching her.

ps I got to put on the left over ones! I don't think I have ever had on real fake nails before (these use glue, not stickers like when I was a kid) They feel kinda odd. well, that and I am short one nail on each hand LOL!
Maybe they can help save my hands from the ravages of my job,too!